I Took an 'E' Holiday

Last week was full of drama. I kind of felt like I was living in a really poorly scripted episode of 'The Bold and the Beautful'. It had all the right elements, without the botox. 


But life is like a canoe. We each have our own little space that we keep track of and our own little slice of things we have to control and organise. And the week before the last one, my life, my little canoe was fine - no drama in my canoe, no leaks, no squeaks. I was just bobbing along merrily. 


Then WHAMMO! 


Drama. Lots of drama.


But the drama was not in my canoe - it was in everyone else's.  And it seemed everyone else who was close to my canoe was standing up causing a ruckus and upsetting my canoe. Yes, others were upsetting my canoe - how terribly unkind of them....


Some of the drama made me angry. Not just a wee bit. I was A.N.G.R.Y. I was a woman consumed. It was not pretty. There was no one person who could be targeted for my wrath, so I was making up facebook status updates in my head that would be barbs and daggers launched out into the deep dark internet. That would show 'everyone' I was mad. That would make me feel so much better.


Then a little tiny voice in the back of my mind said, "What the hell are you doing? You are dancing with fire. You should not dance with fire when in a canoe, B." Which is true...


It was then I had an epiphany {I have had a lot lately}. I was living my life from one Facebook update to the next. This is not cool. Life is more than that.


So, I decided I needed a break, from Facebook at the very least. Anna described it as an 'e' holiday. Which I thought was nice. What I was really doing was taking myself out of a situation where I could have done some really dumb things and hurt some really lovely people. That would not be cool either.


So, I put up a post telling people I was taking the week out of the internet. It felt good to be doing something good. I felt just and righteous and oh so holier-than-though.


What I didn't realise is that I would learn stuff about myself in that week. Sometimes this is good, this time it was not. Without the distraction of Facebook and email {although I had to check email as I was trying to organise a few things with school and other places, so it was a bit unreasonable to limit that...} I was then 'free' to do some other things. 


I normally sit down with a coffee at around 10am when BabyCool sleeps and Miss Z watches tv or is at Kindy. I check Facebook, check email, see how many clicks on the blog and snoop around. This can take anywhere from 15 minutes to 30 minutes. Then, if BabyCool wakes up I would give him his morning tea and surf the net some more. Then throughout the day I would find myself checking to see if anyone had commented on the witty and cheeky things I had written on various people's profiles. I would have the computer open during afternoon tea and then be 'messing around with stuff' most nights too. It was too much.


This week, I shut the MacBook. I thought I was doing it so I didn't do something dumb. But what I learnt was that I was out of balance. My internet life was taking up real time that I was telling everyone I didn't have enough of. Silly B.


I have really enjoyed my week off. I sat in the sun and started reading my bookclub book. I played card games with Miss Z. I took BabyCool for walks in the backyard to see the chickens. I jumped on the trampoline on my own and with the kidlets. I tidied, cleaned, folded and ironed. I got to the end of the week and realised I did not have that much cleaning left to do because I had done more cleaning up each day. 


So, I guess I have a new perspective on Facebook and the time void of the internet. I am going to continue to limit myself and be smarter about how I do things. Here are some things I am going to do...

• No internet during meal times with the kids
• No internet between school pick-up and dinner
• 2 internet free nights a week
• No internet in the mornings unless: beds are made, dishes done, washing hung out

So.... there you have it. An 'e' holiday full of epiphany moments, more to come as well...

Oh, and there may be some people who will tell you that I was on Facebook during that time... And, unfortunately they are right.... Sigh. A gorgeous friend had written this as her status: What are 3 things you can't live without... Who could resist? I did make sure I was *whispering* though... 

Oh, and a peep did lure me in with a funky Hema ad - that was just a nasty trick - she knows I can't resist anything Dutch - dirty tactics.


Anyone out there game to take an 'e' holiday?