Okay, so where to start?

I began this blog with gusto, had lots of ideas, began a list and then.... got a wee bit of a freak out. Am I cool? I asked Friend #1 and his pause was a whisker too long and left me pondering.... Who am I to determine cool? Am I able to discover this and follow through with this crazy project I have given myself? I have since begun speaking to people about 'being cool' and have become baffled as to what it means.

Wikipedia tells me that cool people have three things in common, they are confident, unique and friendly. I want to run and hide under the bed right now: thus I am not confident. I tend to like what everyone else likes: thus not unique and although I would love to think of myself as friendly: I am shy and can be a bit aloof (thanks again Friend #1). I guess the whole point of me pursuing coolness is to push myself out of my comfort zone to become the person I should be.

But really, who am I to assume that I am cool? I don't own a Hermes handbag, I don't wear Lancome lipstick, I cannot walk in high heals (let alone afford Bally shoes), and Louis Vuitton reminds me of Chinese tourists and the black market ring in Paris (one day I may tell you the full version of this cool travel tale). The things I think are cool, others may not. The things others think are cool, I may not. So where does that leave me and my blogging dream?

A friend I spent some time with recently shared her thoughts on my blog about being cool. She thought it was cool to write a blog about persuing coolness, saying that this was daggy in a cool kind of way, which is in itself cool. Another friend said that there are some things that are just universally cool, like Converse sneakers, but I am not sure about whether Friend # 386 thinks these are cool, and she is cool.... (please note that I do in fact have a pair of silver Converse sneakers). My mum laughed when I mentioned my ideas and asked 'why can't I just try to be 'normal' for once?'

It has taken months of agonising and deflecting questions about my next instalment, and I still don't have an answer as to why it has taken so long to add more to my little blog about not much. But, here I go, into the unknown... I just don't want to be a choker. A choker who may end up telling a heavy breathing counsellor in a dingy office in a deserted inner city building that I once began a blog and live with the regret as the only thing I end up following through with is keeping homeless hairless cats and sending love letters to a man in jail..... No, I must pursue coolness... My own version of cool. Stay tuned and watch this space, something cool may just happen to me soon.